Can You Spare Some Grace?
I’m going to get a little deep! If there is one thing I've learned this year of 2020 is the true definition of GRACE. I’m not talking about vertical grace from God; which I am eternally grateful for. I’m talking about the horizontal grace that we extend to our fellow human beings.
What is GRACE? Easiest way to define it is blessings/favor that is freely given, even if it is undeserved.
I’ve spent a lot of time this year rediscovering and reimagining this Christian walk. I’ve realized that we spend so much time preparing for “the after-life” aka heaven, when in essence Jesus came to teach us how to live abundantly while on Earth. I’ll even push to say that Jesus was more focused on teaching us how to be better human beings. The relationships you build while you’re yet breathing is just as important as your spirituality. Jesus was a Professor at relationship building. (A great book to read on this topic is Relational Intelligence by Dr. Dharius Daniels.)
Yes, we are to be disciples (follower of Jesus & his teachings). Yes, we are to teach and build up other people to become disciples. But to be a disciple, you have to be a good human being first. What’s one way to tell your humanity? How you love! A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. (John 13:34 NIV)
Reflection Checklist:
Do you have love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control? (Galatians 5:22)
Is your speech seasoned with the salt of grace? (Colossians 4:6)
Does your presence bring joy and light? Or does it bring tension?
During my own self reflection, I thought to myself who am I to ask God for grace when I'm being stingy with it towards my own kind. (Even though he still gives it to me) Who am I to believe that my victim status earns me the right to hold grudges and withhold grace from someone else. God gifts me grace everyday even though I don’t deserve it. The more I pondered on the concept of grace, it opened my eyes to see that the root of it is FORGIVENESS. I started asking myself questions. Am I bearing unforgiveness in my heart that causes me to shut people out? Or causes me to not even give someone a chance? Does bearing unforgiveness cause me to live life through a distorted lens?
BOTTOM LINE: You need forgiveness in order to spare grace.
For me, grace became easier to extend when I started putting myself in the other person’s shoes and make an attempt to understand their point of view.
A great book to read for personal growth is The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. The second agreement, “Don’t Take Things Personally” should really be a daily mantra. When you realize most times people’s actions are a reflection of what’s going on internally, you will conclude that it’s not about you. In essence, not taking things personally helps you to have grace.
Save this quote by Don Miguel Ruiz
Disclaimer: I understand some situations are more complex. Grace & forgiveness is a longer, intense process for some. That is real, and that is OKAY.
Proverbs 4:23 talks about guarding your heart. Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. (NIV) If you carry bitterness and anger, that’s exactly what is going to flow out of your heart, your mouth, your actions and most detrimental; your decisions. Free your heart with forgiveness, give yourself grace and watch how life changes.
As we are approaching the new year, take this journey with me to REIMAGINE.
Reimagine GOD
Reimagine LIFE
Reimagine LOVE & RELATIONSHIPS
Reimagine YOURSELF
Reimagine: The series will be an exploration of these (4) topics in a brand new lens.
Maybe even a new format. ;-) Stay tuned....
Referenced Scriptures
Galatians 5:22
Colossians 4:6
Proverbs 4:23
John 13:34-35
Referenced Book
Ruiz, Miguel Don, et al. The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom. Amber-Allen Pub., 1997.
Suggested Book
Daniels, Dharius Dr. et al. Relational Intelligence: The People Skills You Need For The Life Of Purpose You Want. Zondervan. 2020.